being qaali

Ramadan has been my favourite time of year for as long as I remember. I don’t even celebrate my birthday but this is something I look forward to EVERY YEAR. This Ramadan was, from my experience, the most trying. I was alone for it, and that is truly when you realise what kind of a Muslim you are. When you’re preparing iftar and suhoor, and dragging yourself out of bed to pray and then going through the day trying to finish grad school and make the most of Ramadan…I’m telling you it gets all types of deep 😂 It also highlights the importance of having Muslim people around you. I never truly understood why that was so important because I had always had my family to support me. This year however I was doing a bit of adulting and being responsible you know? but MAMA I MADE IT, I am so my father’s daughter, out here like a drill-sergeant.

So I really was in no mood for celebrations today, due to me just being a hermit, coupled with being (slightly) homesick but also just feeling heavy with all the things that have happened in the past week globally. Eid for me is usually a time for introspection rather than the ‘turn-up’, so I was looking through my journal and I found this…

It’s very easy for us to slip when we have no support around us, and I feel that many people see someone sinning, and instead of reaching out to them and letting them know they have someone when they’re ready, we bash and criticise. For many of us we’re from very cultural backgrounds and personal struggles isn’t something you talk about especially when it’s to do with ‘taboo’ subjects, so a lot of young Muslims end up feeling alone. Our religion is perfect but we’re not, and I feel that we need to stop shaming people, and acknowledge that we’re all different and what works for me won’t work for you. Some may not know more than two Surahs and someone else may be a revert who has to hide their faith from their family. You may not wear hijab but can recite the Quran from back to front or you could be going around your city feeding the homeless at night without anyone knowing…there are levels to this.
The only way we win is when we are open-minded to our human nature and we accept it instead of making it into something of sin.
May we all have the patience to be there for one another, and help each other become the best versions of ourselves. I pray for a better tomorrow and a world that acknowledges and accepts differences

I hope that wherever you are, you are safe and you are surrounded by L-O-V-E. Eid Mubarak you beautiful people.