I went through all the places where I keep my thoughts [journals], words [blogs] and photos [all over the place] to compile a visual diary of 2016 and what it was like for me. Read More
I was headed into Tesco (local supermarket) and there was this young man sitting outside asking for spare change, I asked him if he needed anything from the store and he said he didn’t but that he was in need of money. I knew I only had a five pound note in my wallet and there was no ATM nearby so I gave it to him. He said thank you and I said it was the least I could do and told him to take care of himself as I walked away.
Death is such a taboo; it has so many different faces and layers to it that the majority of us don’t know what to do when faced with it or how to respond when it is mentioned and I don’t think there’s a formula to it. It’s a very sensitive topic, and I think that you would agree with me that it isn’t really the dinner table conversation starter. It’s more like the topic that leaves the room silent and hollow. But why do we feel so uncomfortable with the one thing that is universally true about life? Why do we push death to the back of our minds as if any of us can escape it?
“Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens.”
This world is so unpredictable, most of us are anxious about what happens next and rightly so. However, I don’t remember signing a contract that guaranteed me a stress free life and I know that you don’t have control over what comes next. What I’ve come to realise is that it isn’t about whether the glass is half empty or half full, it is about what you do with the cards you have been dealt right now. Call me naïve or deluded, but truly I would prefer a reformed pessimist, a born again hippie, maybe an old soul, point being it is all in your mindset. If you believe that you deserve greatness in all aspects of your life and you have faith in something greater than yourself, you will be be fearless. No one can touch you when you exude authenticity and you have let go of the past and future and live in the present.
In a world that is constantly bombarding us with images of what ideal beauty is, in a world where we’re told to always hustle to get more, in a world that labels individuality “quirky”, “weird”, “other”…in a world as such no wonder so many people are struggling to ‘find happiness’.
Happiness isn’t something to be attained, it is something that is innate and can neither be given to you or found. It’s a spiritual awakening of sorts. It stems from the depths of you. Now growing up I wasn’t the most comfortable in my own body and I never truly felt that I was anything out of the ordinary. I was and very much still am a nerd, and I wear that with pride! However, what I began to realise in the past year is that we all have a reference point that we use for validation in our daily lives. Personally for me it was education and getting good grades, that was the constant in my life that I subconsciously defined myself with. Fast forward to a disastrous final year of university I was faced with failure for the first time, a shattered dream of medical school and all of sudden I didn’t know who I was anymore.